A priest was preaching on the value of temperance. With great emphasis he said, “If I had all the beer in the world, I’d take it and pour it into the river.” With even greater emphasis he said, “And if I had all the wine in the world, I’d take it and pour it into the river.” And then finally, shaking his fist in the air, he Said, “And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I’d take it and pour it into the river.” With his homily complete, he sat down very satisfied with what he’d said. Then the leader of song stood very cautiously and announced, “For our offertory song, let us sing Hymn #365, ‘We Shall Gather at the River.”
· Or, “Dear Sweet Jesus, please don’t let my parents find out…”
· Or, “Oh God, if you get me out of this one, I swear I’ll become a priest…”
· Or, “Dear Lord, I will never do that again!”
These are what I like to call prayers of desperation, or 911 Prayers. As though all prayer consisted of were those moments when we pick up the God phone, dial 911, and help is on the way.